The world seems quiet tonight as I put on a pair of jogging pants, a hoodie, and my old pair of converse all-stars to take a run out in the streets of Ohio on an off night on tour. I pull out my ipod and add a few Project 86 songs to my playlist as I begin to stretch in the cold, autumn air. I just finished reading a blog by the lead singer for Project 86, Andrew Schwab, (which is why I am eager to listen to them) and am still pondering a statement that he made about how his mind always seems clearer for writing and thinking while on an airplane. I can relate to trying to "clear my mind", as one of my intentions in running this late at night was to simply do that; clear my mind.
It's not as though I have any major trials or conflicts that I am currently experiencing, but more of a need to spend some time alone with God. In fact, halfway through my late evening jog in the streets, I turned off one of my favorite bands and took out my headphones in attempt to "hear" God more clearly. You see, for the past 3 years as I have toured the country with my brothers in WILLET,I have often found myself in a never-ending search for "balance" in my life. I am a very "driven" person, and can be easily motivated to strive at reaching goals. Sometimes those goals are musical, spiritual, physical, emotional and even financial. Other times, they are related to a specific cause, or a day-to-day activity. Regardless of the final result, I draw inspiration from seeing a great photo, watching an intriguing film, hearing a well-written song, or reading a fantastic article. I find however, as quickly as I am motivated, I can also lose interest with the snap of a finger as well.
The balance that I am searching for is unknown at this point in my life. I absolutely love what God has called me to do as I travel the country, and now the world, sharing my heart about orphaned children in Africa. The confusion sets in however, when I begin to evaluate what I spend a majority of my time on. You see, I am a follower of Jesus first. (Notice I didn't use the word "christian" as that has a very "loose" meaning now days.) Secondly, I am a husband. A very happy and undeserving husband at that. A husband to a beautiful wife that I had the privilege of meeting, dating for 5 years as my first girlfriend, and marrying 2 and a half years ago. Thirdly, I am a member of a God-loving family that I am proud to be a part of. A family that serves together in ministry and values time with each other more then time with the world. And lastly (not that I am only 4 things, but for the sake of my time and yours...) I am the lead singer of a band trying to tell a story. Not a story about us or our music, but a story of children that can't speak for themselves. A story of young boys and girls that will go without food and water. A story of families being torn apart by extreme poverty, famine, drought and war. A story that I would like to see end with hope.
Everyday, I wake up and juggle the many obstacles involved in touring in a band full-time, writing music, reading my Bible, being a husband, staying connected with my family, serving in my church, speaking for the poor, staying healthy, writing articles, producing pod-casts, praying, meeting new people, attending meetings, checking emails, making phone calls, typing proposals, discussing yearly projections... and the list could go on and on and on...
I am coming to realize however that the only thing that truly offers peace in the midst of such chaos is my personal time with Jesus. I can't find it in music, books, television, relationships, concerts, success, money, or recreation. My time with God is the primary strength for fighting a war with the world of greed, obsession, and temptation. I strive to be more like Christ everyday. I want to be known as a husband that gave 110% for his wife. I want to be remembered as a family member that was willing to do anything for the ones he loved. And I want to stand for the ones that can't stand for themselves. Through it all, I am reminded that it is all for The King, and without Him, none of this is worth it.
Sometimes it takes a late night jog to be with God. Other times, it simply involves prioritizing our activities and discovering what truly matters.
What is God teaching you today? Are you struggling to find balance in your daily activities? Do you enjoy what you are doing everyday, or are you simply trying to "get by"?
I look forward to your feedback as we begin to pray for each other...
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About Me
- Jeremy N. Willet
- Westminster, MD, United States
- Jeremy is the lead singer for the rock band, WILLET out of Westminster, MD. With over 6000 records sold in his career, several national tours, and many awards for independant music, Jeremy is ready to share his story. Jeremy speaks around the country on behalf of orphaned children living in 3rd world poverty at Major Festivals and Christian Tours. Jeremy and his wife own a home in MD and sponsor a girl named ABEBA from Africa through FOOD FOR THE HUNGRY. Jeremy continues to tour full time with WILLET, while also writing pod-casts for Food for the Hungry and a blog called "the writings" for the band.
I don't even know where to begin. I struggle to find balance every single day. It makes me think of a Nevertheless song...
ReplyDeleteWe paint You in pictures well.
We praise You and live like we don't.
If You'd ask do we love you still?
Sometimes I can't tell.
I say the Jesus is my Savior, that He is in control, that I'm living for Him. But I never make time for Him. I say "I'm going to spend time with Him today," but I end up watching tv, listening to music, getting caught up with things in this world instead. Even after I read your blog I was like "yes! I'm totally going to make time for Jesus today! Afterall, He IS the reason I'm alive." But yet I ignore Him, and just push Him to the side. Saying I'll spend time with Him later, right now I want to watch tv.
I DON'T enjoy what I'm doing everyday. But for some reason, I don't change things. I know Jesus is ALWAYS there, waiting to talk with me. I'm the one in this relationship that isn't trying. All I need to do is let Him in and acknowledge He is there.
I pray that today I can shut off the music, turn off the tv, and shut everything else out. Spend time with my Savior. Afterall, He IS the reason I'm alive.
Balance, wow this always seems to be something that I am struggling with. I can't ever seem to get the balance in my life; it’s always too much of one thing and not enough of the other. For the past 4 years I have definitely just been trying to get by and just making my own rules up as I go. I said I was a "Christian" and I did the "Christian" things but I was never really leading a life for Christ. But recently I've developed a personal relationship with God again.
ReplyDeleteThis past weekend I took 7 teens to the Fall Retreat that you guys were at. I was very hesitant about going and taking them. I have been teaching the teen Sunday school class for the last 2 months now, and when I first started I was really excited, but as God started giving me the words to tell the teens I wanted to back out. The very first lesson was love, dating, and sex in a Christian world. I wanted nothing to do with this at all, because how could I, a girl who wasn't listening to the bible when it came to those things, encourage a bunch of teens to follow the scriptures. I learned a lot about myself through that lesson and what I am looking for in a relationship. And I realized that God put me in this position, yes, to speak to the teens, but also so that he could speak to me. So he also placed the retreat on my heart and I felt that this was definitely something that the teens needed to experience, I at that age was at retreat every year and loved and I didn't want them to miss out. So I gave up my weekend plans and really wasn't excited that I was going to have to be out in the cold all weekend. But when we got there I was so overwhelmed with everything. Coming to Fall Retreat as an adult chaperone was a lot different, I mean I'm 23 so I still look young and I really like to have fun with my teens and so most people don't think that I am an adult. But on Friday night after the adult meeting I went to round up my teens before service so we could get a seat and I was blown away to find every single one of them together saving seats for me and the other youth director and sitting in the very front row. It actually brought tears to my eyes. But the service started and it was so awesome to see God moving in that room. I loved the worship; I just could feel God doing so many great things then. My teens and I had a great time we worshiped together and were goofing around together especially because my boy Breslin was trying to show me how to worship to the rap songs and well this white girl ain't got no rhythm but I had fun trying. And then Dave came up and talked about being true and letting go of our Delilah's. This really hit home to me and yet again I realized that God had put me at retreat to hear that message.
When I started college in 2003, my best friend and I were inseparable, so much that we went to the same school and he lived on the floor above me. We had been friends since we were 6 and now there were no parents telling us what to do or where to go. But we started out good, we got hooked up with some campus youth groups and everything was great. We worked at church camp in the summers together and when we went back to school for our sophomore year everything changed. He moved into a house with three guys and I spent much of my free time at their house. We started partying a lot and I didn't really think much of it I just thought well everyone does this in college its no big deal. And that’s when I started making up my own rules. But the partying got worse and I started to notice drugs showing up at the house, and I would watch the guys do all kinds of drugs. It got so bad that I couldn't be there, because I was getting tempted. So I decided that I was going to go on an internship to South Africa. I left New Years Eve of 2004-2005. While I was in Africa my best friend spiraled downward and was using drugs everyday. He called me several times telling me that he couldn't do it and that he was just going to commit suicide, and I couldn't handle it, I was struggling with my own demons. I came back to the states 6 months later only to find my best friend completely addicted to drugs and working as a garbage man. At that point I dropped out of school, I didn't know what I wanted to be and thought it was just a bad place and there was too much temptation there. I started working at the camp where the retreat was held, I worked as an outdoor educator there for 2 years, teaching kids about anything and everything. I loved it, but no one was a believer and so there again I found myself partying every weekend. It would start Friday after work and would end late Sunday night. Going back there this weekend made me think of the times when Fall Retreat would happen and I would be up at the top of the hill in the staff house drunk and partying it up while the youth group that I used to attend was down in the assembly hall worshiping. I hit rock bottom and just was out of control, I told my best friend that I couldn't deal with him, he lied to me, he stole from me and he was hiding drugs in my car, my house, everywhere. So I told him he needed to clean up or we were done, but yet at the same time, I was wasted every weekend and being such a hypocrite. I got so frustrated and thought that if I ran away from my problems it would get better, so I packed up everything and moved to California. I stopped partying but then other things started falling apart, my "new" best friend started distancing herself from me and I felt completely alone in the world. I ended up moving back to Ohio and my mother who is such an amazing woman prayed for me every second. She encouraged me and just showed me so much love. And a friend who is such an awesome man of God really inspired me to get my life back on track, and I started too slowly. I started attending church regularly and then decided that God was calling me to help with the Sunday school class. I was in the process of looking for a job, I mean I had worked at camps teaching outdoor education and I’m a college drop out what in the world was I going to do? But I have such an amazing God and he blessed me with an awesome job. Now again, at first I was completely hesitant, but now I find it so rewarding and I know why I’m supposed to be there. God gave me the opportunity to be a Prevention Specialist at a local middle school. I work with kids that are at risk for drugs, tobacco, and alcohol. Is that a coincidence? I think not. God knew that this job would be a challenge for me but that I could do it and that I could relate to these kids. And the job is going great; I pray everyday that God will somehow give me the words to reach my students without breaking school laws. lol But on Thursday night after I got home from a crazy day of dealing with my kids issues and started packing for the retreat there was a knock on my door and my best friend who had been addicted to drugs, whom I had not seen in over 2 years was standing there with tears in his eyes. I didn't know what to do, but he came in and gave me the biggest hug and told me that he made his decision and that he had been clean for 6 months and that he wanted his best friend back.
I was in shock, he is clean and he also got reconnected with God. We sat and talked for hours that night. And I wasn't looking forward to retreat anymore cause I wanted to spend the whole weekend catching up and talking, but Friday night when I heard Dave's message how all 4 of his friends were killed, I broke down. I knew that his story could have been mine, but God was carrying me and was keeping me safe through all the times I doubted and abandoned him. I knew that there were things in my life that were still holding me back from fully giving myself to him. So Friday night after being pumped up worshiping with you I, as an adult leader found myself bawling my eyes out at the alter, with my teens hands laid on me praying for me. At that moment I realized that God has such great things for me, and that although I’m scared and unsure of my future that he will take care of me even in my weakest of moments, I knew this all along but at that moment I started to believe it. So back to the topic I started on, lol sorry I get distracted. Balance, at this moment in my life I feel that as long as I have God in my life and that I put my relationship with him first then everything else will balance itself out.
But I also want to thank you so much, I thoroughly enjoyed worshiping with you guys, you are such an inspiration, and your words are so moving. I love the passion that you guys have you are doing such amazing things. I know that my teens walked away from the weekend with a whole new attitude and so did I. So thanks to all of you guys for such an amazing weekend. And I very much so look forward to going to another venue to see you guys.
Val